A New Driver in the Family



Ashlie with her license

Yes, we have a new driver in the family.  Ashlie took her driving test today and passed the first time.  I am so proud of her but at the same time a bit overwhelmed by it all too.  This now means she can go places by herself without us having to drive her there and pick her up.  I know it's a part of life and part of them growing up but I still want to protect them and keep them safe.

It really hit home to me when we were driving to dinner tonight.  We did the home driver's ed with Ashlie so anytime she would drive with her learner's permit, Don or I would sit in the front seat.  Tonight, Courtnie asked if she could sit in the front.  And it was like WOW, the kids are up front and us adults plus Cayden are in the back seats.  It just seemed really unreal.  And strange at the same time.  It's really hard to explain.

Ashlie was supposed to take her driving test last week Wednesday but the ice storm put a damper on that.  Last Wednesday morning-we had talked about going out to celebrate if she had passed.  Well this week with all the problems we had with the van--in and out of the shop four times in one week--I totally forgot about us going out to celebrate.  On the way home, this afternoon she asked me about going out and it threw me off.  I had already told mom we were having leftovers for dinner tonight.  But how can you tell someone No who is so excited that they had passed their driver's test.  So after much convincing--well really not much at all--we went out to celebrate.  Let me share with you where we went---

In case, you didn't figure it out.  We ate at Chili's tonight.  (And no--Ashlie didn't park near this sign)

Everyone tells me it will be so nice with her driving now, which I am sure it will be.  But it's just a new thing for me to handle in my life right now when there is so much going on.  I told Ashlie that she now had a huge responsibility on her hands, especially with her siblings in the car.  I also told her, I know she is a good driver, it's all the other people on the road that I am worried about.

I am one of those mom's that wants to protect her children like I know a lot of mom's want to do as well.  When I learned Alan had died, my first thought was--What did I do wrong?  I'm supposed to protect my kids and not hurt them.  Then I had to tell Ashlie and Courtnie he had died and that was the most heart wrenching thing I had to do.  Now with this "new freedom" Ashlie has, I know I won't be there to protect her all the time and it's just a bit much to take in at this time.

It is two weeks before we celebrate Alan's 5th birthday and it is weighing heavy on my mind.  As I close this tonight--I will share with you my Alan verse. It's the faith that keeps me going these days--"Faith is the realization of what is hoped for and evidence of things not seen.  Heb. 11.1."